Dating Advice

I don't go out much. Are there other ways of meeting people?

Not everyone feels comfortable to "go out". When you're on your own it's very easy to make excuses to not go out. If you have nobody to meet socially it can seem too daunting to go out alone to a pub or on a night out. You sit there on your own and can't find the courage to talk to anyone. You think that everyone is looking at you and thinking "sad, lonely soul", or something like that.

If you want to meet new people you should avoid going to places where you stick out like a sore thumb. Most new friendships or relationships start from a chance, unexpected meeting - often in the most unlikely places. Many people meet someone in a supermarket, in a bus queue or on a train - not the sort of places you'd go to seek a mate.

Meeting someone new is not so much going to the right places but is actually being in a state of mind and ready to see and act on the opportunity if it arises. How many times have you said after a brief encounter - "I wish I'd said such and such"?

Many people find that organsised "singles holidays" are effective in finding new friends. Take a look at Old Flirt Holidays for some ideas. Link at the foot of this page. Most people going on these holidays are in the same boat as you - on their own, lonely and seeking new friends.

Train your mind to be more outgoing. Practice keeping a smile on your face, and being jolly and more chatty than you probably are. But don't panic and seek desperate measures as you could be moving in to the stalking category. Just learn a good "state of mind" and look happy, receptive and casually chilled. Then members of the opposite sex might feeel more comfortable in making an approach to you.

If you want to make an active move to meet someone don't be afraid to try speed dating. It's usually organised for younger singles, but there are Speed Dating events for mature people too.

Online dating is ideal for shy people as you can take time to work on your dating plan of action. That's why thousands of people join Old Flirt - it makes dating so much easier for older people who feel they have not got brilliant social skills.

If you're hoping to meet someone in the flesh (not online dating) think about what interest you've got, or even some things you "might" enjoy but you've never tried. Think about going to college - do a pottery course - or choose a subject you are not adverse to. Go to a "folk club" even if you don't like folk music. Folky people are usually friendly and will welcome you. All you have to do is sit and listen to music.

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Important Note : Advice on OldFlirt is generalised and given in good faith. Advice may not be suitable for everyone or all situations. OldFlirt cannot be responsible for actions taken based on this advice. To help you make the right decision, please seek professional relationship advice.